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on the downward side of the age mountain.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

D-Day For Moles! or Part 2





It was a dark and stormy day…Well not actually- it was an “everything” day as I like to call a cloudy-rainy-sunny-day. The only precipitation we were missing was hail.

Things did not bode well for Mole City. After an invigorating walk with Bz.Lt.Yr, NSSP was back. His jaw was set in one of those classic male poses- determined, resolute, and gunning for a confrontation.

“Don’t you think it’s a bit wet for The Super Gasser?” I had started to feel a wee bit sorry for the little blind web-footed invaders.

“You can’t stop me woman! Today is the day! I will rule my turf!” his eyes had turned a steely blue and I thought I had been dropped into a grade B movie. Instead of Bill Murray I was faced with John Wayne, The Lone Ranger and Clint Eastwood rolled into one. “I don’t need your help! This is a MAN’S JOB.”

As he gathered his manly tools I quietly pocketed my camera to record the battle. NSSP emerged from the shed with such technical tools as a 3 pronged hand rake, ergonomic serrated scoop, dandelion poker, a rake that has followed us across the USA and his WMD. Long strides quickly brought him to the mound. We both stared fantasizing the upcoming battle. In one quick movement NSSP was on the ground leveling the mound. I refrained from mentioning that Bz.Lt.Yr. could dig faster and more efficiently but I realized that would spoil fun #1 playing in the mud.

After leveling the mound came fun#2 poking the hole with the dandelion poker. Plunge, poke, wiggle, then thrust again and repeat. NSSP was like a mad scientist getting ready for the big bang. NSSP emitted a satisfied grunt. “Ah…I found it!” He sat back on his haunches and stroked The Super Gasser. I knew better than to interrupt or break his concentration.

NSSP whipped out a lighter and lit the fuse. We stared at it as if it was a stick of dynamite and would explode. Instead it started smoking. Thrusting The Super Destroyer into the hole NSSP quickly filled the hole and we looked at the ground as if there would be a horde of little moles clamoring to the top. Instead we saw smoke wisps puffing out of the grass.

Fun#3 commenced with a tarantella stomp/dance where ever we saw smoke escaping.
“We can’t let the smoke escape or it won’t follow the tunnel!” my expert in mole destruction exclaimed.

It was time for fun#4 finding more holes to smoke out. Must use up the sticks! Bill Murray was back poking, stuffing, and stomping in the front yard. When he got too close to the house I pulled the fun cord and called an end to the experiment.

Only time will tell if the moles met their match with NSSP but he did have a great time and vowed to buy more Gasser/Destroyers…I can’t wait...

3 comments:

jooker said...

Poor Harry....

Queen Art-o-Eat said...

the NSSP always gets a poor NSSP!! thanks for the comment.

Unknown said...

hahaha